“Do not be grieved, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” Nehemiah 8:10

It’s such a simple verse but it holds so much power to it.

The past month I can honestly say I haven’t been feeling like myself. I was extremely discouraged about everything. If I was already quiet and reserved before, imagine how I am now. I clocked out, I didn’t do the things I enjoyed anymore, I was a shell of myself. That “not good enough” feeling took over big time. To be honest, I still feel this way and I’m mad at myself. I’m supposed to be stronger than this, happier than this, more grateful than this. 

But then I saw this verse. & I swear, I saw this verse numerous times over the past few weeks. & when I saw it again today, it was such an affirmation.

Once again, I felt my eyes being open to something greater than myself. That these personal grievances doesn’t hinder away the amazing God before me. Sometimes, it’s hard to remember that He’s always there and that’s another thing I’ve been struggling with: feeling His presence. But I’ve realized it’s my own decision to feel His presence, to truly reach out to Him myself instead of waiting for Him to come to me. 

I need to be able to use this and give it back to God through praise and hopefully, I’ll realize true joy again. And I know in that, I’ll find myself even more in love with God.

I know the challenge is to definitely take these words and have conviction behind them. But whatever I become after this, I pray that it’ll bring Him joy as well.

notes